Crazy WhatsApp Statuses

Being a long time detractor of WhatsApp for being anti-productivity at macro-levels, I generally end up disliking it everyday. Which means I got addicted to it because I ain’t taking it off my phone. Uninstalling it was very easy for me, and I have survived for 2 months without it recently. But it was just around a month back that I left my parents’ home to move on with life ahead, so using WhatsApp became a new un-ignorable need.

It was Friday night, and we roomies had already decided to get home some tequila. At the last minute we changed our minds, it was 2 crates of beer and few juniors of Captain Morgan. I loved this spiced dark drum. The groove set in by around 11.30 PM, and we were all playing our own music loud on our individual phones. And we didn’t feel bothered about hearing the other guy’s music in the background. I reached a point where I suddenly started thinking about a girl I like. I have told her a million times that I love her, out of which twice it happened in reality over WhatsApp. I changed the WhatsApp status to something romantic like ‘When I think of you. Nothing could ever stop me from thinking of you sweetheart.. You’re the one who competes LOVE. <3’. Well, I meant completes here. I did not remember the next day that I had changed the status. It stayed on for a few more days on a dormant mobile I sparingly use. After a few days I thought of changing my status, and that’s when I realized what I did after gulping some spiced rum! I did not wait a moment to change it back to something normal..

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The first time I told her that I love her, was on 26th January 2015. This was totally planned, and the situation forced me. Can’t imagine how weird she might have felt that day. My parents booked me for a wedding alliance, all set to happen. Since the previous night I was planning to tell my friend that I seriously like her, before getting hooked up to my parent’s chosen girl.. The situation I faced was like the one in cricket – Need 6 runs in 1 ball to win. I had to hit the sixer. I had the fear of she saying that she is totally disinterested. But still I thought maybe I can hit a sixer, if not then I’d always have to live with the regret of wasting the last opportunity of being with the one I liked. Desperation grew, because this alliance seemed to be obviously converting into a marriage. We were set to visit the girl’s place on 26th Jan.’15 to see her, and discuss about the date of Engagement & subsequently a marriage. I didn’t want to lose the girl I like. I didn’t sleep well that night, when I was busy writing blogs about why I like her etc. On the D-day I was broken, and something in me kept pushing to tell her on WhatsApp that I love her. By noon around 1-ish or 2, I did it. She apologized and politely showed some disinterest. And I had to save my face. I told her to not connect any dots at that sensitive moment, so that she won’t misunderstand me. She would not know when I started liking her, and she might feel uncomfortable if she thinks that I always loved her from day 1. I got dressed up for my slaughter, and decided to meet fate. I went like that quiet lamb who is leashed and taken to the slaughter-house – no sadness, all calm, all well. I wore a waistcoat, and had kept my Lumia 925 in the lower pocket. In front of her apartments, while stepping out of the car my thigh hit the lower end of the mobile which popped out and hit a concrete floor. The screen cracked as if it was not Corning Gorilla, but it was.

Later as time passed I put genuine efforts in making the marriage happen, given a total blackout of communication with the protagonist-girl. Along with the new girl I met we chatted almost everyday but never met up. It was by the end of Feb-15 when I noticed signs that the alliance brought by my parents is weak. I did not know whether to cheer or not. Time became so slow that I did not move, I stood still and waited for the earth to pass below my feet as it spun.

The 2nd time I told the same girl that I love her, was around a fortnight ago. Though it wasn’t planned nor a direct one, I spilt the beans unnecessarily after a confusion.

Right now my WhatsApp status is “Available (all flavours)”.

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